Remembrance
by jotaroismydad
Summary: Sayori takes some time to write in her diary. Set after DDLC. She survived the “incident.” Oneshot.


**Remembrance**

It's a normal summer Saturday evening. The air has cooled down to a reasonable temperature. I'm feeling rather inspired tonight. Slowly, I make my way over to my desk and open one of the drawers to retrieve my old leather bound diary. It's been a long time since I last wrote in it.

I run my fingers along its surface. It's a relic from different times. Times when I couldn't think clearly, and my feelings ran amok. Times when I felt like the weight of the world was crushing me. Times when I felt like I was suffocating. To think this used to be me not too long ago. I think it's been around 4 years or so since those events took place.

Bravely, I grab a pen from a cup on my desk, and put on a light sweater. I'm going to finally bring closure and say goodbye to who I used to be. In writing, of course. How macabre. I think a certain violet-haired lady would appreciate my choice in words. I open the door and leave my house down the street. On my way to the woods, I pass by _his_ house. I can't deny that I miss him. Maybe we'll walk together again someday.

A small pang of sorrow passes through my being. It's a reminder of the times, isn't it? To think that part of me had remained hidden for so long. I finally reach a spot I'm content with. An old stump atop a lush green hill. Many childhood memories were made here. Before the club. Before I realized what I really needed. I take out my pen and open up the diary.

A part of me wishes I would just tear these pages out, and completely forget him. Another part of me weeps in his absence. But the rest of me persists, and I open to one of the last remaining blank pages.

 _Dear Diary,_

 _I've made many memories with you. You've kept hold of my deepest, most discreet secrets for a really long time. You let me put into words a lot of the thoughts cloaked by waves upon waves of tears. The things that were inaudible through my desperate sobs._

 _The truth is, I can't know if I loved him in the way I think I did back then. I love him as a friend, but I lied to myself for so long. I somehow shattered an unbreakable bond with just a few words. A friendship that took years to form is now a smidgen of what it used to be. I know he's miles and miles away now, but that's no reason for me to dwell._

 _Even so, I'm very different from before. No longer do I hide away beneath a mask of smiles. I can't hide away from the storm that is my emotions. It isn't all sunshine and light breezes. Some days my emotions whirl around inside me like a turbulent maelstrom. I've learned to embrace my feelings though. I don't need to rely on others as much as I thought I did to get me through the rainclouds._

 _The rainclouds don't haunt me like they used to. They can loom over my head, taunt me, tease me, but they will never catch me in their downpours anymore. I'm not a burden. I'm not weak. I've found my own umbrella. Rather, I made it._

 _I don't know what fate lies in store for you, dearest diary. All I know is I'm okay now. The very thing I sought in him..._

 _I had it within me all along._

 _I've found my inner sunshine._

 _I still miss him though…._

 _...I want a snack._

My stomach grumbles a tiny bit at that last remark. With a smile, I close my diary. Maybe I'll write him a letter. I was so very confused back then. I can only hope he'll forgive me. If he doesn't, I'll be okay. The truth is I put everyone I know through enough. I'll never try to disappear again.

Almost instinctively, I rub my neck. The very fact I can still feel the scars is reason enough to be happy. I'm still here. Besides, everyone in the club's gone their separate ways. Monika strode off to college. Yuri's already written 2 novels that I know of, and recently got a publishing deal. Natsuki's off at some culinary school.

Me? I'm still living here at home. I recently got certified to become a mental health counsellor. My dad was the last person I knew here. Sadly, I haven't seen my mom since middle school. Not a whole lot of people know that she ran off. I don't hate her for what she did, but my dad had to work so much more with her away. I've always kinda been isolated except for well, _him._

My dad passed late last year, and I got our family house through his will. It's already been paid off and thankfully, I make enough money as assistant counsellor up at my high school to make ends meet.

I begin on my trek back home. The sun's low in the sky, and has begun dipping below the horizon. It's nights like these that I cherish. There's still a nagging feeling inside me. Longing for something. With a few minutes of daylight to spare, I arrive at my house again.

Quietly, I turn the key and open my door and retreat up to my room. My cow plushie is still there as always and I cast my diary onto the bed and give Mr. Cow a big hug. Simple things, always remember the simple things. I can't help but think I'm forgetting something.

I head back down into my living room and notice that my home phone's display is blinking blue. I eagerly pick it up, and open up the voice mail.

" _Hey, you! This IS still your number, right? Like I'd ever be able to forget it."_

My heart flutters a tiny bit. It's him! It really is.

" _I've been meaning to call you, but I'll be visiting family in town next week. I've really got a lot I want to talk about, and I was wondering how things have been! I realize we haven't exactly talked in a while, but I'd really love to talk with you again! Maybe we can go to the creek. Anyways, I miss you a lot, dummy. Call me back, 'kay?"_

A few tears come to my eyes, and I smile quite possibly the biggest smile I can muster, and hit the redial button.

A poem doesn't end, and it eventually stops moving...

...It's waiting for you to write down the rest.


End file.
